I got your blog right here.

Second in an apparent disjointed series of late-night weekend rants.


Here's how I feel about volunteering. Why do I not do it? 90% of it is because yes, I'm too lazy, or too apathetic, or too self-absorbed. I recognize that, I wish it wasn't so, I wish I could change it, I am trying to change it. But the other 10%. I worry, and know, that a large part of my guilt or worry about the fact that I don't do stuff like that, is because I worry that I am not helping, not giving of myself, not doing my part.

But what's the bottom line of this thinking? That other 10% is because I don't want to be just doing it to fulfill my socially created need to do it, appeasing my internalized feeling that I should be doing something, happy and content with myself when I finally do, feeling that yes, I am guilt free, I am off the hook, because I am doing my part, dammit.

Well you know what I think about doing your part? If you've read this blog in the past, you may know, cause I think I've touched on this. This is an entry that I'd enjoy getting responses from the five people that have ever ready what I type here. I think doing your part is a load of bullshit. I'm not gonna get in the face of someone volunteering at the soup kitchen and tell them they're lame, or that they shouldn't be doing it, or that its worthless, or that they're not making a difference.

But you know what? You think you can make a difference? MAKE ONE. That's my challenge. To myself included! MAKE ONE. You make think George W. Bush is an idiot, or you may not, but look at him, his position of power, the things he's done, good or bad. One man from Texas. What's to stop you from being any different? What's to keep any one person from making a profound difference? I hope its not circumstances or opportunities, cause those complaints should be reserved for the people you're helping that are living in the streets.

Make a difference. Don't appeal to your guilt or feed your little feeling of self-worth or happiness that comes from ladling out some soup once a week, cause you know what? If you weren't doing it, someone else would be. Yep- those people would still get their soup in their bowls. Make a damn difference, if you want to- they say "shit, or get off the pot." Equal parts crude and poignant, and I have to agree- stop talking about making a difference, stop talking about problems, stop pontificating- nothing's being changed by your sitting on your horse, and you pretending to care and have an opinion on the matter doesn't do one bit of difference. Go out and MAKE A DIFFERENCE. Quit your yammering and DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT. Look at one any other single individual in the history of mankind has accomplished, and try and do something like THAT, cause you're no different from them. Your potential and your opportunity is no less. And at the end of the day, your soup ladling had made no difference in the world but settled your own peace of mind and allowed you to sit on your ass in front of the TV guillt-free. Congratulations. I'm done.